Letter to My 18-Year-Old Self: A Chapel Talk by Julia Fanikos '26

Julia Fanikos '26 is a day student from South Hamilton, Massachusetts. 

The Govs community gathers every Wednesday in the Moseley Chapel for quiet reflection and a Chapel Talk by a community member about something important to them. Senior Julia Fanikos '26 recently shared her best advice and gratitude for her family.

Please enjoy her recent Chapel Talk, or you can listen to Julia's talk.

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I would like to come up here and say to all of you that “I would have never thought that I’d be giving a Chapel Talk.” But in reality, I have kept a notes app titled “chapel talk ideas” since freshman year. 

And that is a glimpse into who I am. I write down bullet-point conversation topics before I meet someone new. When I have a busy day, I plan out everything I'm doing with precise timestamps, and I constantly have over 20 reminders scheduled on my phone. Some may call it obsessive or forgetful, but I just think I'm prepared. 

Despite my comprehensive notes apps, a week before my Chapel Talk, I found myself staring at a blank Google Doc, watching my cursor blink at me like a tiny clock counting down. How could I write a speech that was both creative and original, and short? So, as any responsible teenager would do, I looked up “most inspirational speeches ever… under 10 minutes.” After listening to all this life advice, I quickly realized that I, an 18-year-old who has to set a reminder to fill my car up with gas or who has read every single book on Audible throughout high school, should never be allowed to give anyone life advice. So instead, I looked to the smartest people I know. My parents. 

My Dad is the most social person I know. He comes to Govs football games by himself, despite not knowing anyone on the team, just to cheer. During my freshman year of JV field hockey, he would switch where he stood depending on which goal we were scoring on, even though I was usually on the bench. He greets not only my friends but anyone he knows I’ve ever gone to school with by taking a selfie with them or giving them a hug. And often when I pull into the driveway, he leaves the grill unattended just long enough to greet me with a dance routine, before I've even gotten out of the car.

Remember all the miracles, big and small, that had to happen for you to be here right now.

My mom, some of you may know, and she's the real reason I'm here. We often spend hours at my kitchen island, just talking about everything going on in my life. When I first came to Govs, some of my teachers would call me by her name, and, secretly, I never minded. Although she falls for AI dog videos and sets the fire alarm off while cooking, probably more than the average person, whenever I'm asked who I'd like to be when I grow up, I think of her. 

When my mom began working here, I saw the campus for the first time while walking around with my brother on a warm August evening. I remember looking at everything and feeling like it almost wasn’t real. And now it’s strange to think about how normal it’s become. How something that once felt so unfamiliar is now filled with people that I love. 

It made me wonder what things that now feel distant or unknown will one day be just as ordinary. So, when brainstorming for this talk, I asked my parents a simple question: “What would you tell your 18-year-old self?

My dad said, “Travel is fine, but putting down roots and belonging to a place is better.” My mom said, “Do things outside your comfort zone and see the world.” They’re divorced. I’ll let you interpret that. 

So somewhere between ‘stay here’ and ‘go everywhere’ they said this to my 18-year-old self:

No one gets through life unhurt. There will be tough times, but they won’t last. And there is so much happiness yet to be discovered. Be bold and strong and honest, and you’ll become the person you dreamt of being.

You won’t remember any of the things you’re stressed about right now. You will remember the friendships, the optimism, and how good you feel.

Go to the movies once a week, and be comfortable going out to eat by yourself.

Computers are not “just a fad” despite what your father says—buy Apple stock. I’m not exactly sure what that one has to do with me, but…

Most people don’t care about your problems—and the ones that do are probably glad you have them.

Family and close friends will get you through the hard times. Remember to cherish them.  

Having money doesn’t mean you won’t have problems, but not having money almost guarantees you’ll have a lot of problems. Work hard to earn and be frugal with spending. I’m guessing my dad really regrets not buying that Apple stock 

Volunteer more. There are so many people who need a helping hand or just a bit of company.

Be genuinely joyful when your family and friends have success. Envy destroys happiness.

Spend enough time on politics to be informed, but not so much time as to be obnoxious about it. Which is ironic, because you should see anyone in my family during Thanksgiving. 

Life throws all kinds of things at you. You need your health to be up to the challenge. Prioritize your diet, sleep, and exercise above all else. 

The career you want doesn’t just happen. You have to seek it out. The good news is that it has never been easier to do that than it is now.  

And finally, 
Remember all the miracles, big and small, that had to happen for you to be here right now. 

Unexpected Gratitude

Throughout my time here at Govs, I’d love to say that the most important thing I learned came from my thesis paper, geometry theorems, or an analytical essay. But more than anything, I’ve learned to be grateful. When I read my parents’ advice back, I realized that none of it works as advice on its own. They’re brought together by collections of moments you don’t fully understand while you’re living them, but instead, quietly shape who you become. 

And that’s what gratitude is to me. It’s realizing that those small moments were actually the ones that mattered most. It's knowing that one day, you'll look back and be grateful.

You'll be grateful for the nights you spent crying to your mom about your new school, whether it was in her office, in the car, or at home. You’ll be grateful she made you stay, because she knew it would work out. 

You’ll be grateful for the moments sitting in AP Lit, surrounded by your Ivy League classmates as you pretend not to online shop, realizing that when Mr. Ogden says you're doing great, he means it, even if your grade doesn't exactly reflect that.

You’ll be grateful that you fell off a table during the Mamma Mia dress rehearsal, because at least now you know you can recover from almost anything.

And finally, one day, you’ll be grateful that your parents sometimes take the long way home, and the advice they give you was really never about “staying” or “going” but about learning to be in the moments you're grateful for. 

And you'll realize that although you thought those extra five minutes were slowing you down, it was actually what got you here today.

Thank you.

You’ll be grateful that your parents sometimes take the long way home, and the advice they give you was really never about “staying” or “going” but about learning to be in the moments you're grateful for.